Twitter:ohmymelli
Staring at
denim covered knee caps, I suddenly felt like Andy. The interview-esque meeting wasn’t for Runway, and
Prada isn’t intimidating. Still,
that last minute “oh fuckstix what did I do” feeling sunk in...hard. Shit. I thought I’d swallowed my spleen.
As usual, in
traditional me fashion, moxie came back, swept through the scene, and set the
stage.
A divine little
coffee house, near the water, in the town I was born in. No worries.
So, eco- happy
gift bag (olive branch)on the empty wooden table. Black (lunch-box) “work bag” on the chair to my left. Classic Chanel quilted tan bag, with
leather and silver handle displaying appropriately (but subtly) the CC
logo. And me. Honestly, un sure any meeting would
really happen, with knees tucked to
chin.
Jeans, Uggs,
Def Leppard concert tee, (washed out and black), a diamond ring set on one
hand, aqua and topaz design on the other and my ipad nestled on top. Breathing is a must if one hopes to accomplish life let alone
a may be interview-esque meeting.
I dropped my
pen in the dirt when I slipped on my way out the door this morning. Fuckstix. I can’t sketch? Oh holy hell I can’t even write. Of all the times in my life, TODAY I
don’t have a writing utensil, really?
SERIOUSLY?! Wait, don’t
panic … type darling. Bingo.
Scene set,
let’s see what I have to say.
I'm waiting for
somebody. I’m good with people, even
the most obnoxious excuse for one, yet here I am, starting to quake like a
sitting duck. Fuck. I don’t remember the moment I swallowed
my spleen, but I absolutely have.
It isn’t necessarily him that’s flipped my spinal column upside down,
rather it’s what he represents (potentially). Probably. It’s very likely this man is the
beginning of my next chapter.
So what do I represent? I’m shy, but I’m here. Strength. My legs are jelly, but I’m here. Confidence.
Snagging an hour of this man’s precious time? Courage, balls and audacity. Nice Mell!
A musician,
business man, cool guy, great husband, dad of the century etc etc etc. Today, to me he's a well respected, writer. Ambitious. A get up and make it work
man. Though it isn’t about money,
it’s about credit where such is due. It’s taken almost a year. E-mails, voice mails, a text here and there, matched
on both his side and mine, accompanied by my sweet natured get up and go, have
resulted in now. I
hope?
Yesterday “the”
song came on. It’s on my iPod, but
I kid you not, it disappears from time to time. At seemingly random moments it plays. Startling me, yet teaching me
timing. I pulled into the
driveway, hopped (literally) out of my Jeep, then calmly but with intention, I
sat down, counted to ten, and sent the following message.
“You don’t have
to get me a job. I’ll do
that. And you don’t need a sob story,
but you’ll kick yourself hard if you pass on mine. Confidence is as much a virtue as patience. (This I know) Lucky for you, I don’t have anybody else smart enough (or
worth said patience) to hound. So,
bark.”
Less than a
second later, he called and said he’s coming to LA. Stay smart Melissa. “When?”.
Tomorrow he replied. Shit
shit shit… “What time do you arrive, I’ll be at the airport.” I’m sorry who jumped in and took over
my vocal cords?? How
…assertive? Whoa. Wow. Go little Meliss.
The kicker is he didn’t
argue. He didn’t? Really? Nope. I didn’t
give him the chance. He told me
the ETA, and the last words were mine.
“I’ll see you when you land”.
Boom! (did I mention the silent fist punch
into the air? There may have
also been a cartwheel)
Sans sleep, I
unraveled myself from the sheets, showered etc, then put myself together,
looked ok (all things considered don’t ask), and … that’s when I lost my
pen. It wasn’t a “slip”, I kind of passed out-ish. Boom indeed.
Found a handful
of pride hanging on a near bye tree branch, went back inside, ate something,
drank a Vitamin Water, dusted myself off, jumped into jeans, and transformed
back to the real me.
In this
technological world of apps up and out the wazoo, the only meaningful energy
source has dwindled it’s way down, to me.
My sisters just
called. "Don't be
nervous. Well c'mon, it's
you.
When have you
not gotten whatever you wanted?
Your there, go get it".
#NuffSaid
Quite Kindly,
Possibly lacking
a spleen, but not on my knees and fully clothed,
Me. Little…But Oh My Indeed.
iHope
PS – He just
walked in. Crimany, I’ve forgotten
how to speak.
