Melli~Oh~My ??? You bet your sweet ass.

              
              


                  It's been a long week.  And it's Tuesday.  Rather than be pissy and cranky the rest of it though, I'm making a choice.   A choice that ONLY I CAN.  Seriously, have you ever been just so dang angry, or sad, abused, sick, tired, etc that you feel like you were run over ( ON PURPOSE) by a truck ( several times )???   Well, if you haven't, then your on drugs and I'd certainly appreciate some of whatever those are!  Just kidding.  :)   Even then, on your very worst day, if you force yourself to smile...you can feel a teeny, itty, bitty, tiny bit better...maybe.   No matter how many people punch you in the face, clock you over the head with a wooden spoon, sexually, verbally,physically, or mentally beat the ever livin crap outta you... they DON'T have the power that YOU DO!   Your life can be your choice.   It's easy to want those people to hurt...or even want to hurt yourself for being hurt in the first place.   It's so easy to sit down, with facebook in front of you, and type onto that bone-headed dumb-ass's wall "YOU SUCK AND THE WORLD SHOULD KNOW...you owe me money...I'm hungry...your mean...still bleeding...your evil..." etc.   HOWEVER, in thinking with a logical head, and keeping your cool, and choosing to rise above those people...it can ONLY do two things...which inevitably will lead to more...in a GOOD way.    One, YOU will have become a better person from the inside out for not sinking to those crassy fuckers' levels...and two, that crassy fuck stick will be annoyed at the least, that you yourself aren't letting them ruin your day!   Does ANY of this make sense?
                There are people that work so very hard, to make my life difficult.    And the very best thing I can do, is look up from down here...because yes, at the moment, I'm here ( hello up there, I'm waiving) here at the bottom of a well...sitting on old rotting mush, dirt, and rusty nails...along with whatever the hell else is down here dying and fading into oblivion.  There's a difference though between me and the "stuff"... I'm choosing, of my own free will, to CLIMB UP...and GET OUT...so that I can sit at the very top of this deep dark hole, and even if you can't see me, one day, have the ability to toss you a line...or anybody else who may be stuck down here.
             We've all got our demons...unfortunately so much of the time those monsters aren't the kind that Snape can just "Sectum Sempra" to bits for us... and honestly, that isn't something I'd want on my shoulders!   Nope, as much as I love Snape, and believe me, Alan Rickman is my hero above all...   But I'm going to take my broken self, my black & blue pride, my bleeding soul, and all the dramatic titles that could be given to any of us that've found ourselves down here, and get the fuck up.   Well, I'm going to wipe the dirt off my ass first, and try my very best not to put my tiny hands into a sloshy slushy mess of mush...avoid the ickyness at all costs, and even if it means beginning by literally crawling, I'm going to smile ( despite the fact that it all hurts so bad) and I'm going to begin my journey up.   At times I'm sure I'll be clinging onto  the walls of dust for dear life.  Despite having my torn up heart, body, and soul  (and clothing) getting caught, occasionally, on the sharp sticks from the past, I'll endure more scrapes and scratches as I hear the voices of nasty below me...teasing me, waiting for me to slip... BUT I'll keep my hands strong,  my eyes focused, my will in place...and I'll remind myself that yes, "where there's a will, there's a way".   More than that, as I've said before, "Where there's Melli's will...There's Melli's way"...   And so help me goodness graciuos, great balls of fiery fury, I'll reach the top.   I'll reach the top and guess what?   ( This is the really cool part)...   I WON'T EVEN BE OUT OF BREATH.
Melli~Oh~My ???   You bet your sweet ass.

Melli Rules

melli@melliinc.com

                 Hi any and all...   Rather than keep posting random me quotes, I've decided to start a rule book of sorts.   SO, Here's number 1 through...well, let me see...

The Laws of Melli
LET ME JUST SAY FIRST...I TRULY BELIEVE THAT ANY WISHES WITH GOOD INTENTIONS AT THEIR CORE, WILL COME TRUE.  

1. RESPECT OTHERS AND EXPECT THE SAME IN RETURN.

2. SMILE EVEN WHEN IT HURTS.

3. IF SOMEBODY HITS YOU WITHOUT VALIDATION...HIT THEM BACK...MUCH MUCH HARDER...IF VALIDATED.

4. WHEN YOU FIND YOURSELF ASKING "IS THIS REALLY APPROPRIATE?" ...  IT ISN'T.

5. DON'T EVER BE AFRAID OF WHO YOU ARE.

6. FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS...EVEN THOUGH THERE MAY BE OCCASIONAL DETOURS.

7. KEEP YOUR ENEMIES CLOSE...YOU ALREADY KNOW THEIR THEM...KEEP YOUR FRIENDS MUCH MUCH CLOSER.

8. ALWAYS WATCH A FUNNY TV SHOW/MOVIE AFTER ENDING A VERY SCARY/SAD ONE.

9. DO YOUR BEST TO MAKE AT LEAST ONE PERSON TRULY SMILE FROM THE INSIDE, EVERY DAY.

10. STICK UP FOR YOURSELF.

11. HAVE FAITH THAT IN THE END, GOOD WILL INDEED PREVAIL OVER THE EVILS WE STRUGGLE AGAINST.

12. KNOW THAT YOU COME FIRST.

13. FAMILY ISN'T MADE BY SHARING BLOOD... FAMILY IS A GROUP OF PEOPLE WHOM YOU CHERISH AS MUCH AS THEY CHERISH YOU...

14. FAITH KEEPS US SANE...LOVE DOES THE OPPOSITE...AND ROCK N' ROLL DOES IN FACT, HEAL THE SOUL.

15. CHERISH YOURSELF... NO MATTER WHO YOU WERE YESTERDAY...YOU CAN CHANGE TODAY.

LUV & ANGELS
QUITE KINDLY YOURS, MELLI

Trauma, Triumph and some really fun photographs. ;)

Melli@melliinc.com

         People tell me all the time how much I look like Audrey Hepburn.   I remind them of her.
         My design technique, is reminiscent of Coco Chanel.
         There's just something about me that takes them back.   Like I myself am becoming a new version of the "Old Hollywood" starlets.
         I love this of course.
      
         Once in a while, I do feel beautiful.  It feels right to me when people associate me with these legends of a magical time in Hollywood.   Tonight, I watched Breakfast at Tiffany's for the first time.   From it the following quote stood out to me.
  
          "...that's just the trouble...it's a mistake you always made...trying to love a wild thing...You mustn't give your heart to a wild thing."

        A "free spirit" isn't  uncommon for me to hear.  Things I do, say or feel aren't ever surprising to those that do truly know me.   Nobody that honest to good gracious knows me would tell you the thought of my becoming a legend is surprising.   People ... even the shallowest of them... have said to me so very often, that I've got "star power".   A "sparkle" inside.
          I grew up feeling like I was magic.   Somehow, I held (and continue too hold) the beauty that designed "Hollywood" throughout it's "Golden Age" and  on it's "Silver Screen".   I've always felt like I WAS part of the magic.   The truth is that since before I can remember, I've seen these images for my life.   These valiantly, courageous,strong, beautiful, glamorous, and famous images...of me...as a star.   A STAR.   For years I've known and held onto these visions and dreams, (bluntly they've been referred to  as "premonitions").
         Here's the kicker.   The entire time that I was meticulously planning, and working non-stop to follow my dreams... I was being hurt... in ways that even "the terrible two's" couldn't have possibly called for.   Yet some how, I never lost the pillar of strength that is ME. The part of myself that is capable of enchanting the world and does in fact make people smile.   No matter how badly I'm hurting...or being hurt by so many others, I've held onto reality.  
       Am I crazy?  NOT A CHANCE!!!   Do I have issues?  Yeah...do you not?   Can you admit that you do?   If you can't...well, then maybe it's time for some professional help.  ;)   Do I know that taking myself out of a situation could possibly lead me into another just as scary?  Yes I do.  "The Devil You Know Is Better Than The Devil You Don't"?   Not always.  
       Faith in myself, confidence in those that do truly love and cherish me as much as I do them, have helped me come through a life of sexual, physical, and verbal abuse.  And the Magic of Good Old Hollywood...and better yet, knowing that I'm becoming a part of it.
        I'm adding a handful of photo's.   They are from an "App"...they are FUN...and ridiculous...but never the less...These are the comic relief...and maybe, just maybe, they are the true tellers for those of you that are too dense to see it anywhere else.  ;)
Luv & Angels, and Quite Kindly Yours, Melli

      
   

Is it then?

melli@melliinc.com

      Below are lyrics from Green Days "21 Guns".   I hope it's not illegal to post them.   I personally am a Green Day fan, and for some reason, today, the words hit me...   We all take away what we will, or can, from any song we may hear.   To say that music is simply a "bunch of words put to a melody" is plain ridiculous.   "While a photograph is an artist's words, a song is an artist's photograph".   This touched me, so I'm sharing it with you.   Take from it what you will.   And tell me...what is worth fighting for...and how do you know when it no longer is?   Or is it eternally worth the battle?   Love & Angels...and as always, Quite Kindly Yours, Mell

Green Day.  21 Guns.

“Do you know what’s worth fighting for?

When it’s not worth dying for?

Does it take your breath away?

Are you suffocating?

Does the pain outweigh the pride?

And you look for a place to hide?

Did someone break your heart inside?

Your in ruins.”

Who is Melli...and why should you know...or why you shouldn't...???

Melli@Melliinc.com

    I suppose in this age of technology, it's hard to keep many secrets.   There is facebook, and probably a hundred other forms of communication ( therefor expression) where one is allowed the opportunities  to share bits and piece's of their world.   While I don't want to hide, I do try to keep things at a distance from most.   It's important though to begin as a human rather than break down in twenty years with a new book, movie, etc, describing the struggles of my life in the past.   It's important to remind the world that "Melli" is indeed a person, just as everyone else.  I hint here and there, that while yes, I am a fun, bouncy, flirtatious girl, I am only human.   I've made mistakes, I'm not perfect, and I work just as hard as anybody and everybody. 
     Quite Kindly, Mell  

See with your Soul...

         There is a book called "The North Star", by Peter H. Reynolds
"Although he was following the well-worn path, he had a growing feeling that he was lost."
"Well...I've been following the path.   It seems as if many people have taken it before me, and there have been many signs along the way..."    In the story, this little boy is following a path.   Although he's drawn to go outside of it.    He is guided in the proper direction through out the book, by a cat.  Then finally a bird asks the boy " But where do YOU want to be going?"   The boy's response is that he's uncertain exactly of where he wants to be going, but he does know he's not heading there by following the path.  The bird then says to him, "Ask yourself where it is you want to go, and then follow the signs you already know."   I'm a night owl.   I do my best work, from sketching, to writing, to designing, to anything at all, when the sun is down.   Finally at the end of the book, the boy begins to in fact see his signs...IN THE SKY...   And by following his own path, he begins the journey of life.  
        Knowing your lost, or on the wrong path, is SO insanely difficult, especially when the signs you see are the ones you THINK you should be seeing.   A friend said the other day, that while he didn't know where he should be, he did know where he was wasn't right.   So in a leap of faith, he quit pushing himself to do something that felt wrong...and began to figure out what exactly he needed to feel he was right.  
         It's not easy to see the bigger picture when your one of the main points of the photograph.   Sometimes, in a leap of honest faith, we have to force ourselves to literally jump out of the box.   And hope and pray that when we stand back up, and brush ourselves off, we are able to actually look at the entire piece of art with our soul.  
         How is it though that we know we're lost?   We don't.   Sometimes, people may hop off the beaten path only to find themselves craving it later on, as it was actually the one they wanted to be on.   The only way to really find out though, is to just go ahead and do it.  
           Follow your dreams...look into the sky...and realize that while most look to the suns placement to route their course, others, like me, look instead to the moon.  
           Follow Your Dreams,
                 Don't Ever Give Up
                         Jump if YOU Want...
                               And Have Faith in Yourself...  
"Where there's a will, there's a way".   Where there's your will, there's your way...even though it may bring us to the same place, our ways of travel may be entirely different.  ;)
                                                Quite Kindly Yours,
                                                         Melli

"Sympathy for the Devil"

"Sympathy for the Devil".   You know the Stones really had this right.  "All the sinners, saints".   It's very true actually.   We are only human yes?  No matter how difficult life gets, we have to also believe, that at some point, something just has to give.   The balance of that ( yes back to my Melli balance), but really, the "something" that does in fact "give" is your choice.   Easily, it could be the giving into, rather than going after and getting.   My knees will not give out...the world will though, give in...to me...devil or angel, I, Melli, am indeed worth it.   AND I won't stop until I've reached my "it".  If it's in voice over, design, or pole dancing.   Giving up isn't an option...and there's not any reason to do so.  I have love, and I have more than enough to share.   So yes, I am both a bit of the Devil, and the Angel, but I've got Sympathy for each of those sides in myself, and "Where there's MY WILL, things will work out MY WAY".   Ok, pep-talk complete.   I will succeed.   And not by sleeping my way up to the top...instead by being awesome, loving, generous, kind, and smiling at every single person I see...